I hate to sound like a broken freakin' record, but I really think we're gonna win this one.
Tampa plays the Cover 2 on defense. The one type of defense that we've always seemed to dominate is the Cover 2. And, we've always seemed to do well against Tampa, even when they didn't suck. Even when everyone on defense was young. They're old now. And slow. And they're still really, really small.
We should be able to run on them. Ben should be able to complete lots and lots of passes to Heath Miller over the linebackers, but in front of the safeties. I've said it before and I'll say it again: To beat the Cover 2, you simply need to protect the quarterback. The reason it worked so well in Tampa for all those years and the reason it's working in Indy right now has more to do with personnel than it does Tony Dungy.
You need a penetrating front four that's fast, three linebackers that can run like hell, two decent safeties, and two smart cornerbacks. The Bucs have a fast middle linebacker. Everyone else is just small. Derrick Brooks isn't fast anymore. He can still make big plays every once in a while, but he's like Zach Thomas at this point. Mostly reputation, not so much skill, still small, not fast anymore. Still smart enough to burn you, though. So we had better make sure we punish him.
Speaking of punishment, we need to beat the hell out of Bruce Gradkowski. If Arizona and Houston didn't have the distinction locked down for the next century, Tampa would have the worst offensive line in the NFL. They're either too young, or WAAAAAAY too old up front. Cadillac Williams can't do it all himself.
He's been doing better the last few weeks, but he's still running behind a suspect line and being supported by an anemic passing attack. We should be able to shut the Caddy down. One of the things we can still do is stop the run. For the most part.
What we REALLY need to do is do to Gradkowski what the Ravens did to Ben. Pressure from the outside (if Haggans and Porter are still alive). When the offensive line becomes obsessed with where the outside pressure is coming from, run delayed blitzes with Farrior, Foote, and Tyrone Carter (who's surprising good at rushing the passer). I seriously think we can get 9 sacks. It bums me out, because I have Joey Galloway on my one Fantasy team, but I'll make that sacrifice for the Steelers.
I'm actually not worried about playing this game without Hines and Troy. Troy was having a pretty lousy season before he got hurt and the Steelers receivers are pretty much interchangable at this point. I really just hope that we cut Cedrick Wilson in the off-season. That guy sucks balls.
And, if you look at our free agent acquistions the past three years, it's no wonder the wheels are falling off. Who'd we get? Cedrick Wilson, Duce Staley, and Ryan Clark. I know I was pumped up about the Clark signing, but he doesn't seem to be worth the league minimum, nonetheless $8 million over 4 years. He can't cover anyone, takes terrible angles to the ball, and is a piss poor tackler. So... great signing!
Duce hasn't played any meaningful football since Week 7. Of 2004. And Wilson caught his first regular season TD as a Steeler against the Saints. Crap.
At least we'll win on Sunday. Provided we don't commit 12 turnovers that are returned for touchdowns and Santonio Holmes can keep his hands on the ball.
We won the Super Bowl last season. I really should just suck it up and deal.
Prediction: Steelers 27, Bucs 14.
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Monday, November 27, 2006
Steelers vs. Ravens Review
Well, so that sucked. It sucked worse than anything has sucked before. I'm sure that, when the Browns beat us 51-0 in 1976, the feeling of suck in the Steel City was more prominent than it is today, but not by much.
It breaks down on defense like this: We couldn't get pressure on McNair and they beat us. It really has nothing to do with the cornerbacks. It does a little, but this defense has always been about how much pressure we can bring. And we're not bringing it this year. And we're getting shredded. Maybe Cowher and Colbert should've drafted some linebackers on the first day of the draft the last few years, huh? Maybe they shouldn't be changing the starting cornerback tandem every game? Could just be they need to change up the starting linebackers. Especially the outside guys. They've sucked a big suck-ass suck all year.
Either they need to play better or we'll get shredded for a bunch of yards every game.
On offense, it's all about the offensive line's inability to block and adjust. You can say the Ravens confused our guys by varying their fronts. You could say that. Only one issue. THE RAVENS USE A 3-4 AS THEIR BASE DEFENSE AND SO DO WE!!!! All game, I knew where the pressure was coming from and who was going to get the first shot at sacking Ben. The Ravens knew that we couldn't block anyone coming off the edge and that Fast Willie can't pass protect. So they brought pressure from the outside. When the entire line was obsessed with who was coming from the outside, they ran delayed blitzes from the inside. At this point, the line looked completely bewildered and Ben was getting hit so much he swore he saw Lee Harvey Oswald picking off cheerleaders from peanut heaven.
From there, they started calling different blitzes of the same variety and all of them worked. They worked because the line didn't know who was coming from where and certainly didn't have any concept of how to block them. If this strategy sounds familiar, it's because the Steelers used it to dismantle the Browns and Colts (and the Bengals in the second half of the Wild Card game) on their way to winning the Super Bowl.
Why didn't we use this tactic to shut out the Browns last week? God only knows. Well, God and Dick LeBeau.
The bottom line is that the Ravens treated it like a playoff game and we didn't. They had a solid game plan that they executed flawlessly and we... looked like a bunch of retards trying to hump a doorknob. And now we're 4-7.
And now the season's over. Even at 4-6, it was a LOOOOOONG shot. The Chiefs made sure we'd face long odds by beating the Broncos Thanksgiving night. Both were 7-4 at that point. You can count on Jake Plummer (even though he's no longer Denver's QB) for honking a late season game and Herm Edwards for mismanaging the game clock at a crucial juncture, but there's no way you could count on either to drop TWO games and there's no way in hell or heaven that you could count on both to drop two. So there's that on top of that.
This'll be the true test of this team. These last five games are winnable. If we finish strong and end up 9-7, it'll be proof that all the high character guys didn't leave the team last year. I figure 8-8 or 7-9. And that sucks. But, with a coach that has ceased to care, an offense that turns the ball over too much and hasn't come together along the offensive line or the wide receiver position, and a defense that got too old and slow to execute the system, that's what we deserve.
We got lucky last year. We won the Super Bowl. Let's focus on that.
Well, that and the fact that, if this year is just like 2003, maybe next year will be like 2004. And maybe, just maybe, we'll get to face off against Cowher's Cowboys in the Super Bowl.
One other thing:
The Cowboys are going to win the Super Bowl. They're coming together at the right time, everyone's contributing, Parcells finally has the right personnel to run his defense, and everyone's smiling and hugging. They're a game up on the Giants, the Redskins are imploding, and the Eagles don't have McNabb. They'll be two games up on the Giants after Sunday.
You're telling me the Bears can beat these guys? The Seahawks? The Panthers? The Saints?
And hey, the Colts couldn't beat them, either.
It breaks down on defense like this: We couldn't get pressure on McNair and they beat us. It really has nothing to do with the cornerbacks. It does a little, but this defense has always been about how much pressure we can bring. And we're not bringing it this year. And we're getting shredded. Maybe Cowher and Colbert should've drafted some linebackers on the first day of the draft the last few years, huh? Maybe they shouldn't be changing the starting cornerback tandem every game? Could just be they need to change up the starting linebackers. Especially the outside guys. They've sucked a big suck-ass suck all year.
Either they need to play better or we'll get shredded for a bunch of yards every game.
On offense, it's all about the offensive line's inability to block and adjust. You can say the Ravens confused our guys by varying their fronts. You could say that. Only one issue. THE RAVENS USE A 3-4 AS THEIR BASE DEFENSE AND SO DO WE!!!! All game, I knew where the pressure was coming from and who was going to get the first shot at sacking Ben. The Ravens knew that we couldn't block anyone coming off the edge and that Fast Willie can't pass protect. So they brought pressure from the outside. When the entire line was obsessed with who was coming from the outside, they ran delayed blitzes from the inside. At this point, the line looked completely bewildered and Ben was getting hit so much he swore he saw Lee Harvey Oswald picking off cheerleaders from peanut heaven.
From there, they started calling different blitzes of the same variety and all of them worked. They worked because the line didn't know who was coming from where and certainly didn't have any concept of how to block them. If this strategy sounds familiar, it's because the Steelers used it to dismantle the Browns and Colts (and the Bengals in the second half of the Wild Card game) on their way to winning the Super Bowl.
Why didn't we use this tactic to shut out the Browns last week? God only knows. Well, God and Dick LeBeau.
The bottom line is that the Ravens treated it like a playoff game and we didn't. They had a solid game plan that they executed flawlessly and we... looked like a bunch of retards trying to hump a doorknob. And now we're 4-7.
And now the season's over. Even at 4-6, it was a LOOOOOONG shot. The Chiefs made sure we'd face long odds by beating the Broncos Thanksgiving night. Both were 7-4 at that point. You can count on Jake Plummer (even though he's no longer Denver's QB) for honking a late season game and Herm Edwards for mismanaging the game clock at a crucial juncture, but there's no way you could count on either to drop TWO games and there's no way in hell or heaven that you could count on both to drop two. So there's that on top of that.
This'll be the true test of this team. These last five games are winnable. If we finish strong and end up 9-7, it'll be proof that all the high character guys didn't leave the team last year. I figure 8-8 or 7-9. And that sucks. But, with a coach that has ceased to care, an offense that turns the ball over too much and hasn't come together along the offensive line or the wide receiver position, and a defense that got too old and slow to execute the system, that's what we deserve.
We got lucky last year. We won the Super Bowl. Let's focus on that.
Well, that and the fact that, if this year is just like 2003, maybe next year will be like 2004. And maybe, just maybe, we'll get to face off against Cowher's Cowboys in the Super Bowl.
One other thing:
The Cowboys are going to win the Super Bowl. They're coming together at the right time, everyone's contributing, Parcells finally has the right personnel to run his defense, and everyone's smiling and hugging. They're a game up on the Giants, the Redskins are imploding, and the Eagles don't have McNabb. They'll be two games up on the Giants after Sunday.
You're telling me the Bears can beat these guys? The Seahawks? The Panthers? The Saints?
And hey, the Colts couldn't beat them, either.
Friday, November 24, 2006
Steelers vs. Ravens Preview
I have to say right off the bat that this game is impossible to predict. Not only have the Steelers themselves been impossible to predict thus far this season, but Steelers/Ravens games are tougher to divine than Steelers/Browns games. And, we haven't had a normal game against the Hated Ravens since the day after Christmas in 2004. Last year, one of the games was started by Tommy Maddox, so that doesn't count. The other one, we threw the ball 38 times. Thirty-eight times. Against the Ravens. And, it was a close game (the Monday night game on Halloween). And it's not like we were down 19-3 midway through the third quarter and had to throw like hell to catch up (ended up winning 20-19).
I was at the game on the day after Christmas in 2004. That's the way a game against the Ravens should go. We jostled back and forth for the first half, went in with a 13-6 lead, then staged a 9 1/2 minute drive to open the second half, where we ran the ball 12 out of 14 plays. It was 20-6 at that point and the game was over.
The first series for both teams is the key to the whole game. If the Ravens score on their first possession, we're screwed. If we can't run the ball on the first possession, we're screwed.
The reason for this is that Cowher and Whisenhunt don't seem to have any patience with the running game when we play the Ravens. They abandon it too quickly and start throwing the ball like crazy when there's even a hint of it not working. If we can't run the ball in the first quarter/series, take a look at Cowher, then (hopefully) they'll show Whisenhunt. Because Whisenhunt ends up looking like a battered spouse about midway through the second quarter. He's got that far-off expression, his hair's all messed up, and it looks like he could weep at any moment.
He'll start calling pass after pass. Instead of weakly claiming that he "fell" he'll call pass after pass. Instead of absent-mindedly dropping dishes while he's unloading the dish washer, he'll call pass after pass. This will continue until Cowher buys him a pair of diamond earrings so he'll stop crying at the dinner table.
The point is that the Ravens are not as talented a football team as the Steelers. Except for possibly 2000, they never have been. It just seems that they play us tougher than any other team in the league. Always have, always will.
If we can run the ball out of the gate and force them into a three-and-out on their first possession, we're golden. If we can't run and they score, we're screwed. We might make it close. It might be close even if we can run the ball and we force them to punt. But, at all costs, we need to stop any Sleeping With the Enemy crap from happening between Cowher and Whisenhunt. If that happens, the game is effectively over.
Prediction:
What the hell, let's say Steelers 17, Ravens 13.
I was at the game on the day after Christmas in 2004. That's the way a game against the Ravens should go. We jostled back and forth for the first half, went in with a 13-6 lead, then staged a 9 1/2 minute drive to open the second half, where we ran the ball 12 out of 14 plays. It was 20-6 at that point and the game was over.
The first series for both teams is the key to the whole game. If the Ravens score on their first possession, we're screwed. If we can't run the ball on the first possession, we're screwed.
The reason for this is that Cowher and Whisenhunt don't seem to have any patience with the running game when we play the Ravens. They abandon it too quickly and start throwing the ball like crazy when there's even a hint of it not working. If we can't run the ball in the first quarter/series, take a look at Cowher, then (hopefully) they'll show Whisenhunt. Because Whisenhunt ends up looking like a battered spouse about midway through the second quarter. He's got that far-off expression, his hair's all messed up, and it looks like he could weep at any moment.
He'll start calling pass after pass. Instead of weakly claiming that he "fell" he'll call pass after pass. Instead of absent-mindedly dropping dishes while he's unloading the dish washer, he'll call pass after pass. This will continue until Cowher buys him a pair of diamond earrings so he'll stop crying at the dinner table.
The point is that the Ravens are not as talented a football team as the Steelers. Except for possibly 2000, they never have been. It just seems that they play us tougher than any other team in the league. Always have, always will.
If we can run the ball out of the gate and force them into a three-and-out on their first possession, we're golden. If we can't run and they score, we're screwed. We might make it close. It might be close even if we can run the ball and we force them to punt. But, at all costs, we need to stop any Sleeping With the Enemy crap from happening between Cowher and Whisenhunt. If that happens, the game is effectively over.
Prediction:
What the hell, let's say Steelers 17, Ravens 13.
Monday, November 20, 2006
Steelers vs. Browns Review
Hey, if I was only going to get one out of two predictions right, I'm glad I got the Steelers-Browns prediction right (even if I was way off on the the score).
We've got one more game against the Browns. I'm glad we won this one, but I'll say it again: I won't get upset about this trainwreck of a season as long as we sweep the Browns. That's the key to the whole season for me at this point. I would like to sweep the Hated Ravens, but I doubt that's gonna happen. More on that later this week.
A few observations:
We've got one more game against the Browns. I'm glad we won this one, but I'll say it again: I won't get upset about this trainwreck of a season as long as we sweep the Browns. That's the key to the whole season for me at this point. I would like to sweep the Hated Ravens, but I doubt that's gonna happen. More on that later this week.
A few observations:
- Cowher still doesn't look like he cares. We were trying to rally to win. Against Cleveland. In Cleveland. We gave up an interception return for a touchdown and a kick return for a touchdown. AND Ben threw three picks. He didn't look upset. I think I yelled more than he did. Just disturbing. And the rumors about him jumping ship and going to be the Coach/GM/President for the Browns next year had better not be true.
- Hines ain't playing against the Ravens. It's probably just a knee bruise or a sprain. He didn't tear anything. But, it also didn't look like he was feeling real good after it happened.
- The receivers need to be more consistent and they need to catch the damn ball. This goes for all of them (even Hines). If they can be consistent, we won't miss Hines as much against the Hated Ravens. They're starting to show flashes of being a really, really solid group with Washington, Holmes, Wilson, and Ward. IF they're able to catch the ball.
- I don't know about anyone else, but I just didn't get the feeling like there was a possible way we could lose that game. The whole time, I was sure we were going to come back and win. And, ordinarily, when we give up two big plays for touchdowns like that, I don't feel that way. Maybe the season's turning around.
- We're still not making the playoffs. I mean, if we finish 10-6, then MAYBE we get in. But, KC finished 10-6 last year and missed the playoffs. So, we'd definitely need some help.
- We got help last year. That's all I'm gonna say.
- Well, that and the fact that the game that turned our fortunes around last year was really the Cleveland game. Everyone thought it'd be close, everyone thought we were overrated, everyone knew that it was a divisional rivalry and you could throw the records out the window... and then we kicked the shit out of them. Big statement. Seriously. Bigger statement than the win over the Bears, which is the generally accepted "turning point" of last season.
- Ben has already thrown 17 interceptions. Jesus in Heaven. That's a lot.
Friday, November 17, 2006
Bonus Prediction!
Okay. I wasn't going to mention anything about the Ohio State-Michigan game. Really. I wasn't. There was too much written about it this week, so I decided to leave it alone.
Then Bo Schembechler died.
I am officially declaring that there is absolutely, positively, no way in Heaven or Hell that Michigan loses this game now. It's not possible. I mean, Bo was at least 1,535,768 times more important to Michigan than Brian Piccollo was to Gale Sayers and the Chicago Bears. And they made a movie out of that. It had James Caan and Lando Calrisian and everything.
No way they lose. There's now officially too much at stake. And, this game, officially, becomes the most important game of the season. The BCS Championship game will pale in comparison to this one. Too much drama.
And the over/under for "montages showing Bo Schembechler through the years" has officially been set at 856.
Then Bo Schembechler died.
I am officially declaring that there is absolutely, positively, no way in Heaven or Hell that Michigan loses this game now. It's not possible. I mean, Bo was at least 1,535,768 times more important to Michigan than Brian Piccollo was to Gale Sayers and the Chicago Bears. And they made a movie out of that. It had James Caan and Lando Calrisian and everything.
No way they lose. There's now officially too much at stake. And, this game, officially, becomes the most important game of the season. The BCS Championship game will pale in comparison to this one. Too much drama.
And the over/under for "montages showing Bo Schembechler through the years" has officially been set at 856.
Thursday, November 16, 2006
Steelers vs. Browns Preview
I know we're both 3-6. I know that neither of us has a chance of making the playoffs. I know that the season is lost. But, it's the BROWNS, for God's sake. Can't lose to the Browns. When we got to the playoffs in 2002, no one expected much. It was going to be Tennessee or Oakland that went to the Super Bowl. That much was common knowledge. However, it was VITALLY important that we at least freakin' beat Cleveland in the playoffs.
And beat them we did. And we're going to beat them again on Sunday.
Have you ever heard of the Charlie Frye Drinking Game? Well, probably not, because I made it up. My point is that Frye makes so damn many mistakes throughout the course of the game, that the best way to track them is by drinking.
And beat them we did. And we're going to beat them again on Sunday.
Have you ever heard of the Charlie Frye Drinking Game? Well, probably not, because I made it up. My point is that Frye makes so damn many mistakes throughout the course of the game, that the best way to track them is by drinking.
- Every time he throws the ball away, have a sip of beer.
- Every time he drops back to pass, stops for an instant, then sprints off like a cat on speed in a random direction for no apparent reason, that's two sips.
- Every time he comes to the line, looks at the defense, then starts looking around at the rest of the offense, wild and confused, like each member of the defense had their backs turned to him and part of a sailboat painted on their asses, that's three sips.
- Every sack is a chug.
- Every fumble is two chugs.
- A fumble lost is a shot.
- Interceptions don't count. Especially if you have to drive. And you have to work the next day.
I guarantee that you'll be drunk by halftime. If I followed these rules during the 41-0 stomping we handed them last season, I'd have been seeing my dead Grandmother crawling up my leg with a hunting knife in her teeth halfway through the first quarter.
My point is that he sucks. He still looks dazed, confused, and generally like a four year-old trying to assemble a book shelf.
I understand that Kellen Winslow and Braylon Edwards are fantastically talented athletes. I understand that they've got a lot of upside. There's just a big hole through the middle of them. Could you see Winslow picking dirt out of his helmet? Or Edwards blocking down on a defensive lineman or a linebacker? I sure couldn't. And I wouldn't want to follow these pretty boys into battle.
Ted Washington and Willie McGinest are a combined 314 years old and weigh a combined 7,358 pounds (most of that's Washington). The rest of the guys on defense are either rookies or fourth string defensive backs that are starting because of injury.
Seriously. If we lose to this team, it might be worse than losing to the Raiders. I want another 45-7 or 41-0 whitewashing. They are the Browns, they're from Cleveland, and they must be punished for that.
Our receivers match up fantastically against their cornerbacks. They can't play run defense, given that Washington is three days older than dirt and about as effective. They're small. They're not physical. Romeo Crennell will keep these guys playing hard, but I can't shake the feeling that they'll fold up their tents, go get their shineboxes, and go home if we hit them hard enough long enough.
I feel a big game from Ben, Hines, maybe Fast Willie, and DEFINITELY Joey Porter. As long as we don't turn the ball over, we're cool. We just need to let Charlie Frye work his magic. Hopefully, we'll be showing our collective tits and having our friends hold our hair back by halftime.
Prediction: Steelers 34, Browns 17
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
Steelers vs. Saints Review
There are two reasons I'm posting this late. One is that I was helping my Dad put up a fence in my backyard. The other is that I'm still not sure what to make of this game. I don't know if anyone else is feeling this way, but I'm conflicted. I'm happy that we won, but...
If we have to spend too much time this season with Tyrone Carter at safety and that Madison kid (didn't even know he was on the roster) at cornerback, we're screwed. It could, however, be very good for Porter and Haggans. LeBeau, if he knows he's got a bunch of JV guys in the secondary, might pull out some really exotic stuff from the archives. This means that Porter and Haggans will be coming on pretty much every play, from all angles, doing stunts and slants and stuff that only LeBeau has thought of. So, I'm excited for that. I'm not excited about the prospect of the other team actually blocking what we throw at them and then exploiting the mismatches in the secondary. Especially since we still have to play the Bengals and Panthers.
When the hell did we start winning games 38-31? In previous seasons, if we put up 38 points, I'd say that the other team scored 10, maybe 20. If we scored 38, that meant that we out-and-out dominated. The reason we scored 38 points is because we allowed the Saints to dictate the game to us. Aside from the 45-7 drubbing that we handed KC, we haven't controlled a game this year. And that sucks.
Sean Payton has a bright future in the NFL. That guy is a hell of a coach. Aside from the absolutely idiotic challenge in the third quarter, he did everything right. Here's what he had to work with: A young team that was missing its most consistent weapon in the passing game (Joe Horn), an undersized defense and horrible linebackers, on the road, picked by Vegas to lose the game (I still think Vegas is in more shock than anyone in Steeler Nation about how this season has progressed), an early 14-0 deficit, and the fact that they had been overachieving all season, so they really didn't know what they had. He took all that and was still in a position to dictate the flow of the game to the Pittsburgh Steelers. He had his guys ready to play, they never gave up, and they overcame three turnovers, almost coming back to win the game. That's really impressive.
Also, did you notice what he did in the last two minutes of the game? He knew that he was involved in a shoot-out. Either he was going to lose the game by turning the ball over on downs, or he was going to be the last team to score in regulation, willing to take his chances in overtime. Brilliant. That two minute offense was absolutely flawless (except for the fumble at the end, of course). He kept taking time off the clock, calling running plays to mix it up and keep the defense off balance, and made sure he saved his timeout for when it really counted. Really, just a great job.
While we're talking about coaches, Cowher has been involved in two consecutive home games with the season on the line. In both of those games, his team committed multiple errors in judgement and six turnovers. There were too many lead changes to count, and his defense was repeatedly shredded, giving up big plays all over the field. There were also struggles on special teams. Ordinarily, the man would look like Michael Ironside in the last scene of Scanners. In the past two games, he looked more like a man whose three year old daughter dressed the family dog like a geisha. There's white powder all over the place, the dog is having a severe allergic reaction, and she ripped up the wife's favorite kimono to make the costume... BUT SHE'S SO DAMN CUTE. He looked like he wanted to yell, but just didn't have it in him. He's lost his fire. Maybe he'll find it back in Dallas next season.
We rushed for 200+ yards, but 150 of that came on two plays. Did I tell you about their shitty linebackers or did I tell you about their shitty linebackers? Every time the Steelers play someone that has no talent on the perimeter, they should run Willie off-tackle all game. He's going to bounce out of the hole, run to the outside, and leave everyone in the dust on at least one occasion in those games. We need to do this. I'd also like to add that Cowher has absolutely no confidence in Najeh Davenport. This was evidenced by the fact that he called a timeout after Willie's second long run. Didn't need to. It probably affected momentum. We probably would've scored if Duce ran out there in his sweats and took the ball. But Cowher wanted to give Willie a breather because he doesn't trust Davenport. That's been haunting us all season and it will come back to haunt us later in the season.
And, even though I thought the Saints played a better game, we've got four easy games coming up on the schedule: Browns, Ravens, Bucs, Browns. Then we play the Panthers. Then the Ravens and then the Bengals (their season might be over by then). We really can run the table. Not saying it will make a difference, but we could do it. And, if we don't finish at least 8-8, this will officially be the worst coaching job of Cowher's career.
If we have to spend too much time this season with Tyrone Carter at safety and that Madison kid (didn't even know he was on the roster) at cornerback, we're screwed. It could, however, be very good for Porter and Haggans. LeBeau, if he knows he's got a bunch of JV guys in the secondary, might pull out some really exotic stuff from the archives. This means that Porter and Haggans will be coming on pretty much every play, from all angles, doing stunts and slants and stuff that only LeBeau has thought of. So, I'm excited for that. I'm not excited about the prospect of the other team actually blocking what we throw at them and then exploiting the mismatches in the secondary. Especially since we still have to play the Bengals and Panthers.
When the hell did we start winning games 38-31? In previous seasons, if we put up 38 points, I'd say that the other team scored 10, maybe 20. If we scored 38, that meant that we out-and-out dominated. The reason we scored 38 points is because we allowed the Saints to dictate the game to us. Aside from the 45-7 drubbing that we handed KC, we haven't controlled a game this year. And that sucks.
Sean Payton has a bright future in the NFL. That guy is a hell of a coach. Aside from the absolutely idiotic challenge in the third quarter, he did everything right. Here's what he had to work with: A young team that was missing its most consistent weapon in the passing game (Joe Horn), an undersized defense and horrible linebackers, on the road, picked by Vegas to lose the game (I still think Vegas is in more shock than anyone in Steeler Nation about how this season has progressed), an early 14-0 deficit, and the fact that they had been overachieving all season, so they really didn't know what they had. He took all that and was still in a position to dictate the flow of the game to the Pittsburgh Steelers. He had his guys ready to play, they never gave up, and they overcame three turnovers, almost coming back to win the game. That's really impressive.
Also, did you notice what he did in the last two minutes of the game? He knew that he was involved in a shoot-out. Either he was going to lose the game by turning the ball over on downs, or he was going to be the last team to score in regulation, willing to take his chances in overtime. Brilliant. That two minute offense was absolutely flawless (except for the fumble at the end, of course). He kept taking time off the clock, calling running plays to mix it up and keep the defense off balance, and made sure he saved his timeout for when it really counted. Really, just a great job.
While we're talking about coaches, Cowher has been involved in two consecutive home games with the season on the line. In both of those games, his team committed multiple errors in judgement and six turnovers. There were too many lead changes to count, and his defense was repeatedly shredded, giving up big plays all over the field. There were also struggles on special teams. Ordinarily, the man would look like Michael Ironside in the last scene of Scanners. In the past two games, he looked more like a man whose three year old daughter dressed the family dog like a geisha. There's white powder all over the place, the dog is having a severe allergic reaction, and she ripped up the wife's favorite kimono to make the costume... BUT SHE'S SO DAMN CUTE. He looked like he wanted to yell, but just didn't have it in him. He's lost his fire. Maybe he'll find it back in Dallas next season.
We rushed for 200+ yards, but 150 of that came on two plays. Did I tell you about their shitty linebackers or did I tell you about their shitty linebackers? Every time the Steelers play someone that has no talent on the perimeter, they should run Willie off-tackle all game. He's going to bounce out of the hole, run to the outside, and leave everyone in the dust on at least one occasion in those games. We need to do this. I'd also like to add that Cowher has absolutely no confidence in Najeh Davenport. This was evidenced by the fact that he called a timeout after Willie's second long run. Didn't need to. It probably affected momentum. We probably would've scored if Duce ran out there in his sweats and took the ball. But Cowher wanted to give Willie a breather because he doesn't trust Davenport. That's been haunting us all season and it will come back to haunt us later in the season.
And, even though I thought the Saints played a better game, we've got four easy games coming up on the schedule: Browns, Ravens, Bucs, Browns. Then we play the Panthers. Then the Ravens and then the Bengals (their season might be over by then). We really can run the table. Not saying it will make a difference, but we could do it. And, if we don't finish at least 8-8, this will officially be the worst coaching job of Cowher's career.
Friday, November 10, 2006
Real Quick
This guy must read my column on a daily basis. I've been talking about this stuff for weeks:
http://msn.foxsports.com/nfl/story/6150854
http://msn.foxsports.com/nfl/story/6150854
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Steelers vs. Saints Preview
First things first: Cowher said he was going to make some "serious changes" this week. And all he did was bench Ike Taylor. I'm thinking that he eventually wants McFadden and Taylor to be his starting corners, Clark and Troy to be his safeties, Okobi to be his center, and Santonio Holmes to figure out how to return punts and be his #2 receiver. He's almost there. All he needs to have happen is for McFadden to do well and Ike to fight his way back into the line-up. When he does, Ike will take Deshea Townshend's place. Problem solved. Then, he needs to put Hartings on IR. Okobi starts the rest of the season by default.
Holmes is already starting to step up in the passing game (which is why Hines and Wilson are doing better as well), he just needs to remember how to return punts. He was really good at it in college... And, seriously, we need to get Willie Reid back. Where the hell is he? He can't be any worse than Holmes. Putting Wilson or Coclough back in there doesn't do anything for this team in the long term, so why do it? The season's shot. The only way someone is going to lose their job is if there's someone younger behind them. Which is why Ryan Clark needs to watch out. It could just be a matter of time before Anthony Smith is back there. Once Cowher forgets that he committed a dumbass penalty in the Broncos game. Oh, wait. Everyone on the team is guilty of those. So, really, that's no big deal.
Speaking of dumbass penalties, I forgot to mention this in the Broncos vs. Steelers Review on Tuesday... In the third quarter of the Denver game, with the Steelers trailing 21-10, Willie Parker caught a screen pass and advanced it to the Denver 32 before he got SMACKED by Al Wilson. Wilson's hit was legal and it was a good one. It was so good, in fact, that he straddled Willie (that sounds dirty) and started walking forward, making it very difficult for Willie to get up (again, dirty). He then proceeded to yell DIRECTLY AT WILLIE PARKER in what I can only assume was a, shall we say, TAUNTING fashion. No flag. No comment from the announcers. ESPN.com actually ran an article the next day that talked about what a bad day the officials had on Sunday, but there was no mention of the non-call on Wilson.
The Sunday before that, the Steelers got flagged not once but TWICE for taunting. Having seen all three plays, and being as unbiased as possible, I don't see how the Porter and Foote could've been flagged against Oakland, but Wilson wasn't flagged on Sunday. That penalty against Denver would've moved the ball up to the Denver 17 and could've changed the game. It's true that Ben threw another pick to Champ Bailey on that drive, but you never know. The real point is that taunting seems to fall under the same, weird, subjective grey area that horse-collar tackles do. If you don't always call it, take it out of the rule book. Troy Brown was flagged for taunting in the Patriots-Colts game for missing the referee and accidentally hitting a Colt when he flipped the referee the ball after a touchdown. It's dumb, it has a profound effect on the outcome of the game, and I want it to stop.
About Them Saints:
The previous two seasons, I'd say we win this game by a lot. The Saints have an explosive offense that's built mostly around speed. They can't play a lick of defense, they turn the ball over too much, and Reggie Bush has more negative plays this year than I can count. Normally, this is a team that we crush by beating them to the perimeter, pressuring their QB into a few costly turnovers, not committing any turnovers ourselves, controlling the clock by running the ball, and waiting for them to self-destruct.
One problem with that strategy this season: Teams are using it on us. And succeeding, apparently, because we're 2-6. I really believe that New Orleans will try this strategy on us. And I really believe that they'll succeed.
Deuce McAllister is rejuvenated this year because New Orleans has three talented wideouts in Colston, Horn, and Henderson. They come out with those three guys, McAllister, and Reggie Bush, and defenses have to keep 7 in the box to avoid getting burned. Plus which, McAllister gets to beat up on a bunch of nickel and dime backs because of the other personnel on the field. The end result is that Deuce, a big, fast man that can wear down a defense, gets a lot of easy carries against a soft defense while they're concentrated on chasing Bush, Colston, Horn, and Henderson.
We can slow them down by keeping Casey Hampton in on first and second down, regardless of what formation they come out in and what personnel group they have on the field. If our line can clog up the middle of the field, they'll have no choice but to start handing the ball to Bush in space and watch him pile up -5 yards on 18 carries. And, I don't care if he hasn't done a whole lot in the Saints offense, we need to put Troy on Reggie Bush and keep him on Reggie Bush. Troy's the only athlete on the defense that can hang with Reggie.
Unless, of course, Cowher demoted Ike so that he could put him on Bush the whole game.
On offense, we just need to hold onto the football. The Saints have a pretty damn good defensive line. I'll give them that. It's also true that they didn't know who two of their three starting linebackers would be when the season started. Two guys eventually "won" jobs and the Saints have been trying to cover it up ever since.
If we get a lead an decide to take the air out of the ball, they'll have no choice but to throw their merry band of underachieving linebackers out there to try and stop us. Since they've got such a high-powered offense, teams tend to gear their offense for a shoot-out. As a result, the Saints have been able to come out in mostly nickel and dime defenses, keeping their sucky-ass linebackers on the sidelines.
If we come out in power formations, we'll force them to either get shredded by having too many small defensive backs out there, or put their worst athletes on the field.
In both situations, we win.
However, in order to win, we need to stop their most explosive playmaker consistently, pressure the quarterback, play half-decent pass defense, and effectively run the ball. We haven't been able to do all those things in one game all season.
Predicition:
Saints 30, Steelers 17
Holmes is already starting to step up in the passing game (which is why Hines and Wilson are doing better as well), he just needs to remember how to return punts. He was really good at it in college... And, seriously, we need to get Willie Reid back. Where the hell is he? He can't be any worse than Holmes. Putting Wilson or Coclough back in there doesn't do anything for this team in the long term, so why do it? The season's shot. The only way someone is going to lose their job is if there's someone younger behind them. Which is why Ryan Clark needs to watch out. It could just be a matter of time before Anthony Smith is back there. Once Cowher forgets that he committed a dumbass penalty in the Broncos game. Oh, wait. Everyone on the team is guilty of those. So, really, that's no big deal.
Speaking of dumbass penalties, I forgot to mention this in the Broncos vs. Steelers Review on Tuesday... In the third quarter of the Denver game, with the Steelers trailing 21-10, Willie Parker caught a screen pass and advanced it to the Denver 32 before he got SMACKED by Al Wilson. Wilson's hit was legal and it was a good one. It was so good, in fact, that he straddled Willie (that sounds dirty) and started walking forward, making it very difficult for Willie to get up (again, dirty). He then proceeded to yell DIRECTLY AT WILLIE PARKER in what I can only assume was a, shall we say, TAUNTING fashion. No flag. No comment from the announcers. ESPN.com actually ran an article the next day that talked about what a bad day the officials had on Sunday, but there was no mention of the non-call on Wilson.
The Sunday before that, the Steelers got flagged not once but TWICE for taunting. Having seen all three plays, and being as unbiased as possible, I don't see how the Porter and Foote could've been flagged against Oakland, but Wilson wasn't flagged on Sunday. That penalty against Denver would've moved the ball up to the Denver 17 and could've changed the game. It's true that Ben threw another pick to Champ Bailey on that drive, but you never know. The real point is that taunting seems to fall under the same, weird, subjective grey area that horse-collar tackles do. If you don't always call it, take it out of the rule book. Troy Brown was flagged for taunting in the Patriots-Colts game for missing the referee and accidentally hitting a Colt when he flipped the referee the ball after a touchdown. It's dumb, it has a profound effect on the outcome of the game, and I want it to stop.
About Them Saints:
The previous two seasons, I'd say we win this game by a lot. The Saints have an explosive offense that's built mostly around speed. They can't play a lick of defense, they turn the ball over too much, and Reggie Bush has more negative plays this year than I can count. Normally, this is a team that we crush by beating them to the perimeter, pressuring their QB into a few costly turnovers, not committing any turnovers ourselves, controlling the clock by running the ball, and waiting for them to self-destruct.
One problem with that strategy this season: Teams are using it on us. And succeeding, apparently, because we're 2-6. I really believe that New Orleans will try this strategy on us. And I really believe that they'll succeed.
Deuce McAllister is rejuvenated this year because New Orleans has three talented wideouts in Colston, Horn, and Henderson. They come out with those three guys, McAllister, and Reggie Bush, and defenses have to keep 7 in the box to avoid getting burned. Plus which, McAllister gets to beat up on a bunch of nickel and dime backs because of the other personnel on the field. The end result is that Deuce, a big, fast man that can wear down a defense, gets a lot of easy carries against a soft defense while they're concentrated on chasing Bush, Colston, Horn, and Henderson.
We can slow them down by keeping Casey Hampton in on first and second down, regardless of what formation they come out in and what personnel group they have on the field. If our line can clog up the middle of the field, they'll have no choice but to start handing the ball to Bush in space and watch him pile up -5 yards on 18 carries. And, I don't care if he hasn't done a whole lot in the Saints offense, we need to put Troy on Reggie Bush and keep him on Reggie Bush. Troy's the only athlete on the defense that can hang with Reggie.
Unless, of course, Cowher demoted Ike so that he could put him on Bush the whole game.
On offense, we just need to hold onto the football. The Saints have a pretty damn good defensive line. I'll give them that. It's also true that they didn't know who two of their three starting linebackers would be when the season started. Two guys eventually "won" jobs and the Saints have been trying to cover it up ever since.
If we get a lead an decide to take the air out of the ball, they'll have no choice but to throw their merry band of underachieving linebackers out there to try and stop us. Since they've got such a high-powered offense, teams tend to gear their offense for a shoot-out. As a result, the Saints have been able to come out in mostly nickel and dime defenses, keeping their sucky-ass linebackers on the sidelines.
If we come out in power formations, we'll force them to either get shredded by having too many small defensive backs out there, or put their worst athletes on the field.
In both situations, we win.
However, in order to win, we need to stop their most explosive playmaker consistently, pressure the quarterback, play half-decent pass defense, and effectively run the ball. We haven't been able to do all those things in one game all season.
Predicition:
Saints 30, Steelers 17
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
Steelers vs. Broncos Review
Okay. I'm ready to talk about it now. Yesterday was... too soon.
The season, is, effectively over. I really wish we could hook up Madden 2007 and simulate the rest of it (we might have a decent shot of going 8-8 if we did that), but that's why they play the games.
And, even though it sucks, it's kinda liberating. I mean, really, who cares what happens the rest of the year? I'll still scream at any Steeler that drops an easy pick, fumbles inside the other team's 20 (like that would ever happen), or takes a dumb penalty (ditto). The thing is that the season won't be hanging in the balance. As much as I loved the playoff run last year, it was damn stressful. I needed a break from football until about June. I seriously didn't start thinking about the season until Ben's accident.
This year? I'm going to sit back and watch the scary talent the Steelers possess try to play spoiler against a lot of teams with less talent and better records. I mean, everyone knows that Denver's got a top 5 defense. Going into the Indy game, they had let up two touchdowns all season. And we put up 499 yards on them. It took Ben about 90 attempts, but he threw for over 400 yards. Once again, we outgained them. We're going to finish the season as the best team (statistically) ever to finish 6-10. I don't doubt that we'll be in the top 10 on offense and defense (which is measured in yards per game) at the end of the season.
We've got a lot of talent. But, bad special teams play and turnovers will kill you. And they've been killing us all year. Sunday's game was a microcosm of the whole year. All year, we've been going, "Yes! Yes! Go! Ahhhhhhh, SHIT!" All year. I think I did that 38 times on Sunday. I must have done it 489,153 times this season. They run up and down the field, then they turn it over. Unless they turn the ball over before they get started (like a fumbled snap, a fumbled punt, or an INT at the beginning of a drive).
Our defense isn't terrible. We just haven't gotten pressure on the QB, because we miss Kimo and Hampton, Porter and Haggans have either been injured or ineffective, and LeBeau's too afraid to send Foote, Farrior, or Troy on a blitz unless we really really really really need something good to happen. Let me put this in all caps: OUR PASS DEFENSE IS NO WORSE THAN IT WAS LAST YEAR. It's just that we were able to mask the fact that our defensive backs struggle in man coverage by blitzing a lot and playing more zone. This year, I think we assumed that Ike Taylor was suddenly going to be a shutdown corner because we paid him a lot of money and Deshea Townshend was going to keep playing solid forever, just because he was a nice guy and came back for less money. It's not Ryan Clark. It's not Troy. It's not anyone in the defensive backfield. It's the guys up front and their inability to pressure the quarterback.
I'm going to state this again for any new readers (all three of them): When the Steelers struggle on offense, it's the offensive line. When they struggle on defense, it's the linebackers. And that's it. Why then, have we been drafting defensive backs and receivers in the first three rounds the past few years? Okay. I don't have an answer for that one. But I know what position we should draft from with our top 10 pick in next year's draft, and it ain't receiver.
And I'd really like to see some stats on average starting field position for the Steelers this year. Our average start has to be our 23 yard line, whereas the opponent must be starting at about their 45 yard line. If not midfield. Watch the games. Sure, we've given up 176 points in 8 games, but how many of those points have come when the opposing team has a short field to work with? Most them. When teams have to drive 70 or 80 yards on our defense, it hasn't happened. Or, at least, not often.
Then there's the fact that we absolutely SUCK in the red zone. We miss the Fat Man. Davenport may be fat, but he's a poor substitute. Holmes may be short, skinny, and shifty, but he's a poor substitute for Randle-El. I know that I said we weren't going to miss them when Fat Man retired and El signed that huge contract with the Redskins. I remember. But, you have to admit that there's no way you thought our red zone performance would be this bad or that Holmes would be this terrible. There's just no way. In previous seasons, I'd be all excited when we got down by the goal line. When El went back to return a punt, I'd wonder what amazing thing he'd do once he caught the ball. This season, I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. It's a sickening feeling to watch game living in abject terror, trying to figure out how we're going to screw up a great opportunity so it won't be as shocking when it happens.
All in all, I really think it'd be better if we just knew we had a lousy team. Fans in Cleveland, Oakland, and Detroit are aware that they root for bad organizations with crappy players. They're used to it. With the Steelers, the carpet doesn't match the drapes.
A few other things, while I'm thinking about it:
The season, is, effectively over. I really wish we could hook up Madden 2007 and simulate the rest of it (we might have a decent shot of going 8-8 if we did that), but that's why they play the games.
And, even though it sucks, it's kinda liberating. I mean, really, who cares what happens the rest of the year? I'll still scream at any Steeler that drops an easy pick, fumbles inside the other team's 20 (like that would ever happen), or takes a dumb penalty (ditto). The thing is that the season won't be hanging in the balance. As much as I loved the playoff run last year, it was damn stressful. I needed a break from football until about June. I seriously didn't start thinking about the season until Ben's accident.
This year? I'm going to sit back and watch the scary talent the Steelers possess try to play spoiler against a lot of teams with less talent and better records. I mean, everyone knows that Denver's got a top 5 defense. Going into the Indy game, they had let up two touchdowns all season. And we put up 499 yards on them. It took Ben about 90 attempts, but he threw for over 400 yards. Once again, we outgained them. We're going to finish the season as the best team (statistically) ever to finish 6-10. I don't doubt that we'll be in the top 10 on offense and defense (which is measured in yards per game) at the end of the season.
We've got a lot of talent. But, bad special teams play and turnovers will kill you. And they've been killing us all year. Sunday's game was a microcosm of the whole year. All year, we've been going, "Yes! Yes! Go! Ahhhhhhh, SHIT!" All year. I think I did that 38 times on Sunday. I must have done it 489,153 times this season. They run up and down the field, then they turn it over. Unless they turn the ball over before they get started (like a fumbled snap, a fumbled punt, or an INT at the beginning of a drive).
Our defense isn't terrible. We just haven't gotten pressure on the QB, because we miss Kimo and Hampton, Porter and Haggans have either been injured or ineffective, and LeBeau's too afraid to send Foote, Farrior, or Troy on a blitz unless we really really really really need something good to happen. Let me put this in all caps: OUR PASS DEFENSE IS NO WORSE THAN IT WAS LAST YEAR. It's just that we were able to mask the fact that our defensive backs struggle in man coverage by blitzing a lot and playing more zone. This year, I think we assumed that Ike Taylor was suddenly going to be a shutdown corner because we paid him a lot of money and Deshea Townshend was going to keep playing solid forever, just because he was a nice guy and came back for less money. It's not Ryan Clark. It's not Troy. It's not anyone in the defensive backfield. It's the guys up front and their inability to pressure the quarterback.
I'm going to state this again for any new readers (all three of them): When the Steelers struggle on offense, it's the offensive line. When they struggle on defense, it's the linebackers. And that's it. Why then, have we been drafting defensive backs and receivers in the first three rounds the past few years? Okay. I don't have an answer for that one. But I know what position we should draft from with our top 10 pick in next year's draft, and it ain't receiver.
And I'd really like to see some stats on average starting field position for the Steelers this year. Our average start has to be our 23 yard line, whereas the opponent must be starting at about their 45 yard line. If not midfield. Watch the games. Sure, we've given up 176 points in 8 games, but how many of those points have come when the opposing team has a short field to work with? Most them. When teams have to drive 70 or 80 yards on our defense, it hasn't happened. Or, at least, not often.
Then there's the fact that we absolutely SUCK in the red zone. We miss the Fat Man. Davenport may be fat, but he's a poor substitute. Holmes may be short, skinny, and shifty, but he's a poor substitute for Randle-El. I know that I said we weren't going to miss them when Fat Man retired and El signed that huge contract with the Redskins. I remember. But, you have to admit that there's no way you thought our red zone performance would be this bad or that Holmes would be this terrible. There's just no way. In previous seasons, I'd be all excited when we got down by the goal line. When El went back to return a punt, I'd wonder what amazing thing he'd do once he caught the ball. This season, I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. It's a sickening feeling to watch game living in abject terror, trying to figure out how we're going to screw up a great opportunity so it won't be as shocking when it happens.
All in all, I really think it'd be better if we just knew we had a lousy team. Fans in Cleveland, Oakland, and Detroit are aware that they root for bad organizations with crappy players. They're used to it. With the Steelers, the carpet doesn't match the drapes.
A few other things, while I'm thinking about it:
- Duce Staley needs to go. If he's not contributing, other than looking FANTASTIC in those sweats, he needs to be cut. The other option would be to have my buddy, Weidman, take his roster spot. Weidman is 6' tall and weighs 300 pounds. He'd be a fat, jolly man on the sidelines and a great cheerleader. I can't speak to how good he looks in sweats, but I'm sure it's not that much different. We're currently paying Duce $2.5 million for this season. Weidman, in a tremendous show of team spirit, is willing to work for half that. Sure, he's still re-habbing from a severe fracture to his ankle, but I'm sure the Steelers' medical staff can see to that. Weidman gets some medical attention, gets to stand on the sidelines, and the Steelers get to save $1.25 million. In addition, if it got out that someone from Pittsburgh made the team after not playing football in high school or college that has a broken ankle, I think the fan base would still root for Weidman more than they would for Duce. The man hasn't dressed for a game since the Super Bowl. It's time to drop the Duce and put Weidman on the payroll.
- The decision to pull Santonio Holmes off the kick return team should've been made after the Kansas City game. Doing it this past Sunday is a case of too little, too late.
- Anyone else think Cowher's situation is a distraction for the players? I sure do. He doesn't seem as passionate, as disciplined, or as angry any more. In his press conferences, he sounds like an insurance agent that adopted a troubled kid from the ghetto... "We keep trying. I keep telling them to hold onto the football. Things happen. The past is the past. We just need to go out and try hard next week. I still believe in them..." GO OUT AND BUST SOME FREAKIN' HEADS! While we're at it, I don't think Cowher believed anything he said in the off-season about "last year being last year." At any rate, the players certainly didn't buy into it. I don't think they've gone out and put maximum effort into any game. Maybe not even the KC game. I think they just expect to go out and dominate because it's their birthright.
- Along those lines, the team seems to go out on the field and wait for the other shoe to drop. Just the looks in their eyes. They don't have the confidence they once had and, judging from Sunday, don't seem to have faith in each other anymore, or faith that they can overcome a bad situation. When they were down by 10 on two separate occasions in the playoff game against Cincy last season, it seemed like we were down by a field goal, or even tied. When we were down by 7 against Denver on Sunday, it seemed like we were down by three touchdowns. It's a weird feeling.
- As much as I hate to say it, we need to put Hartings on IR and let Okobi finish the season. Hartings is going to retire after this season and we need to see what Okobi can do.
- Cowher's going to "retire," after this season, then Parcells is going to leave Dallas, then Dallas is going to sign Cowher to an offer he can't refuse. Just making sure everyone's prepared.
- Given the fact that we got killed on the salary cap the last two years when Ben met every "likely to be earned" incentive, as well as most of the "unlikely to be earned" incentives on his contract, we get a break this year because he's having a bad season. Throw in the $6 million we'll save when Hartings retires, the $2.5 million we'll save when we drop a Duce, the credits from the incentives we thought Ben would earn but didn't, the fact that we won't have to count "likely to be earned" stuff next season, and the fact that the salary cap is going to go up another $10 million, and we'll have plenty of space to sign free agents. And our top 10 draft selection.
Thursday, November 02, 2006
Steelers vs. Broncos Preview
First Things First:
I want to bitch about something that's not related to football. It's okay. Together, we can make it through this.
Remember the "Fun Size" or "Bite Size" candy bars they used to give away during Halloween? Well, they still give them away. But, I had one today and it was about as thick as my thumb and half as long. I remember when they were longer and at least twice as thick.
My point is that the fight against child obesity has gone too far. Candy bars are getting smaller because people are afraid that kids will get too fat. You've seen the commercials. There's a child version of Jared, the Subway guy. Chubby kids are being forced to get into shape.
I know about diabetes and hypertension and heart attacks and all that. The problem is that, when I was a kid, the larger "Bite Size" candy bars required two bites. Sometimes three. This involved work. If I was riding a sugar high, more bites meant more work. Eventually, I'd give up. Plus which, I couldn't cram more than one of the big Bite Size candy bars in my mouth at once. I could get two or three of the smaller ones in my mouth at that age. So, if you're a kid, on a tremendous sugar high, unknowingly re-enacting the Heather Graham/Julianne Moore scene from Boogie Nights (with the only exception being that your Mom would alway answer "Yes" when you asked, "Are you my Mom?"), and you're able to cram this many Fun Size candy bars in your mouth, you're going to eat more candy in a sitting.
And, since the sugar high would get more and more intense until you crashed, you'd eat waaaaay more candy total for the night. Once your body gets used to all that sugar, it craves it. If it involves too much work, you're less likely to do it. This is also why I think condoms are a bad method of birth control. Too much wrapper, too many steps, too fleeting an erection. Why not just go for it? But I digress.
And yes: I'm at least 40 pounds overweight.
Preview, For God's Sake:
I hate to sound like the ultimate homer, but I really think we're going to win this game. And, aside from the fact that I'd give anything to break the three-way tie between us, the Browns, and the freakin' Raiders, I want us to win this game for other reasons.
I want to win this game to rub it in Pat Bowlen's face.
Before the season, Bowlen said that he wouldn't be willing to play the Steelers in the Thursday opener at Heinz Field (the season opener for the NFL season has usually pitted the Super Bowl champion - yep, we won the Super Bowl last year- against whoever they beat in the previous year's championship game). Bowlen said it was "too soon." He didn't want his players to go through that. What is this, an ugly divorce? Was Bowlen thinking about the children? Won't someone please think about the children!?!?
Speaking of children, I thought the NFL was a multi-billion dollar business, not a bunch of grown-ups trying to watch over underprivileged children in the schoolyard. Do they want a do-over? Was the sun in Champ Bailey's eyes when he missed that interception? I'm sure there was a car in the road. Denver didn't want to come back from halftime because dinner was ready and they had to be at a recital later.
Why couldn't the NFL say, "Uh... we want ratings, not to protect the fragile egos of your kids. Play the games on the schedule and GO GET YOUR FUCKIN' SHINEBOX!" Maybe it's just me.
Anyway, I want us to win to shut him up. To show him that we can beat the Broncos in the opener, on the moon, even when we're 2-5. And then they should shine our shoes. Hard work builds character in a child. And, if they worked a little harder, they wouldn't be so obese.
Why We'll Win:
We're actually playing well at home. We're 2-1. And the only loss came in that freakin' game against the Bengals. I'm not saying we won't commit 5 turnovers in this game, because, nowadays, you never know, but we've been playing well at home. The fans will be fired up. Cowher had that "angry drinker face" going all week, like a father under pressure that's had three martinis. His wife just called him a failure, the kids are screaming, his head is spinning, he should have just told the boss to shove it. Eventually, he's going to snap. In the meantime, he's going to be one angry son of a bitch and make the kids mow the lawn six times a day, just because he can.
He'll have the team fired up. They're ready to show everyone that they're not done yet. Ben has hopefully cleared some of the cobwebs. The offensive line (possibly minus Hartings), will show up and be angry. And, when it comes down to it, the offensive line just needs to be angry and determined. It's the same guys every week. They don't shrink or become weaker week to week. It just seems to be a matter of whether or not they want it more than the guy across from them. In Kansas City, they wanted it more. In Atlanta, Jacksonville, and San Diego, they didn't. This week, they will. Or, they should. Damnit, they better.
From a strategic standpoint, they play a lot of man-to-man on defense. They play it better than any other team in the league. Their linebackers run like safeties, cover like cornerbacks, and hit like, well, linebackers. Their safeties cover like linebackers and hit like linemen. And run like an 80 year-old woman with a bad hip. Their corners, led by Champ Bailey, are good.
The big thing, though, is that they play a lot of man-to-man. And our guys, if nothing else, run good routes. Even if the guy covering you is a better player, you still have an edge because at least you know where you're going. Our guys, when the defense mans-up on them, tend to rip the guys covering them apart. See the Atlanta game. And the Cincy game. And the Kansas City game. When Miami went man, we shredded them (ask Heath Miller). It could be that we suck against zone defenses. But I prefer to say that we're really good against man coverage. Zones confuse Ben. Horribly. I think this is a good time to mention that Oakland plays mostly zone. Or, at least they did when we played them.
Denver can't produce a pass rush. Even if they could against other teams, their defensive line consists of a bunch of guys who used to play for Cleveland and weren't good enough to hang on with the Browns. And they don't blitz much, if ever.
When the Broncos have the ball, all they can do is run it. They ran all over Indy, but Indy gives up 158 yards a game on the ground. We don't. When we face a team that can only run the ball, we usually dominate. We need to put the ball in Jake Plummer's hands and wait for him to screw up. It happened in the AFC Championship Game and it will happen on Sunday.
We'll stop the run, confound Plummer (seriously, Rod Smith is 100 years old and I dare you to name another receiver on the roster beyond Javon Walker), and pounce on those few, key turnovers.
Why We Won't Win:
18 turnovers in 7 games. In two of those games (both wins) we comitted a total of two turnovers. That means that, in five losses, we've committed SIXTEEN turnovers. We'll lose if Ben plays like he did against Oakland. Or everyone else plays like they did against Atlanta and Cincy.
Denver's fired up, too. Their defense got beat to hell and back by the Colts last week. Their nose is bloody. The question is whether they'll respond like Skutt Farkas and cry, or respond like Jean-Claude Van Damme and beat the crap out of us. In French.
Here's the worst part. WE'RE THREE POINT FAVORITES! Either Vegas has completely lost their minds, or they're trying to motivate the Broncos. I'm not sure which it is. I do, however, refuse to believe that a rational thinking person thinks we're going to win by three.
I mean, I think we're going to win by ten. So there you go.
Prediction: Steelers 20, Broncos 10
I want to bitch about something that's not related to football. It's okay. Together, we can make it through this.
Remember the "Fun Size" or "Bite Size" candy bars they used to give away during Halloween? Well, they still give them away. But, I had one today and it was about as thick as my thumb and half as long. I remember when they were longer and at least twice as thick.
My point is that the fight against child obesity has gone too far. Candy bars are getting smaller because people are afraid that kids will get too fat. You've seen the commercials. There's a child version of Jared, the Subway guy. Chubby kids are being forced to get into shape.
I know about diabetes and hypertension and heart attacks and all that. The problem is that, when I was a kid, the larger "Bite Size" candy bars required two bites. Sometimes three. This involved work. If I was riding a sugar high, more bites meant more work. Eventually, I'd give up. Plus which, I couldn't cram more than one of the big Bite Size candy bars in my mouth at once. I could get two or three of the smaller ones in my mouth at that age. So, if you're a kid, on a tremendous sugar high, unknowingly re-enacting the Heather Graham/Julianne Moore scene from Boogie Nights (with the only exception being that your Mom would alway answer "Yes" when you asked, "Are you my Mom?"), and you're able to cram this many Fun Size candy bars in your mouth, you're going to eat more candy in a sitting.
And, since the sugar high would get more and more intense until you crashed, you'd eat waaaaay more candy total for the night. Once your body gets used to all that sugar, it craves it. If it involves too much work, you're less likely to do it. This is also why I think condoms are a bad method of birth control. Too much wrapper, too many steps, too fleeting an erection. Why not just go for it? But I digress.
And yes: I'm at least 40 pounds overweight.
Preview, For God's Sake:
I hate to sound like the ultimate homer, but I really think we're going to win this game. And, aside from the fact that I'd give anything to break the three-way tie between us, the Browns, and the freakin' Raiders, I want us to win this game for other reasons.
I want to win this game to rub it in Pat Bowlen's face.
Before the season, Bowlen said that he wouldn't be willing to play the Steelers in the Thursday opener at Heinz Field (the season opener for the NFL season has usually pitted the Super Bowl champion - yep, we won the Super Bowl last year- against whoever they beat in the previous year's championship game). Bowlen said it was "too soon." He didn't want his players to go through that. What is this, an ugly divorce? Was Bowlen thinking about the children? Won't someone please think about the children!?!?
Speaking of children, I thought the NFL was a multi-billion dollar business, not a bunch of grown-ups trying to watch over underprivileged children in the schoolyard. Do they want a do-over? Was the sun in Champ Bailey's eyes when he missed that interception? I'm sure there was a car in the road. Denver didn't want to come back from halftime because dinner was ready and they had to be at a recital later.
Why couldn't the NFL say, "Uh... we want ratings, not to protect the fragile egos of your kids. Play the games on the schedule and GO GET YOUR FUCKIN' SHINEBOX!" Maybe it's just me.
Anyway, I want us to win to shut him up. To show him that we can beat the Broncos in the opener, on the moon, even when we're 2-5. And then they should shine our shoes. Hard work builds character in a child. And, if they worked a little harder, they wouldn't be so obese.
Why We'll Win:
We're actually playing well at home. We're 2-1. And the only loss came in that freakin' game against the Bengals. I'm not saying we won't commit 5 turnovers in this game, because, nowadays, you never know, but we've been playing well at home. The fans will be fired up. Cowher had that "angry drinker face" going all week, like a father under pressure that's had three martinis. His wife just called him a failure, the kids are screaming, his head is spinning, he should have just told the boss to shove it. Eventually, he's going to snap. In the meantime, he's going to be one angry son of a bitch and make the kids mow the lawn six times a day, just because he can.
He'll have the team fired up. They're ready to show everyone that they're not done yet. Ben has hopefully cleared some of the cobwebs. The offensive line (possibly minus Hartings), will show up and be angry. And, when it comes down to it, the offensive line just needs to be angry and determined. It's the same guys every week. They don't shrink or become weaker week to week. It just seems to be a matter of whether or not they want it more than the guy across from them. In Kansas City, they wanted it more. In Atlanta, Jacksonville, and San Diego, they didn't. This week, they will. Or, they should. Damnit, they better.
From a strategic standpoint, they play a lot of man-to-man on defense. They play it better than any other team in the league. Their linebackers run like safeties, cover like cornerbacks, and hit like, well, linebackers. Their safeties cover like linebackers and hit like linemen. And run like an 80 year-old woman with a bad hip. Their corners, led by Champ Bailey, are good.
The big thing, though, is that they play a lot of man-to-man. And our guys, if nothing else, run good routes. Even if the guy covering you is a better player, you still have an edge because at least you know where you're going. Our guys, when the defense mans-up on them, tend to rip the guys covering them apart. See the Atlanta game. And the Cincy game. And the Kansas City game. When Miami went man, we shredded them (ask Heath Miller). It could be that we suck against zone defenses. But I prefer to say that we're really good against man coverage. Zones confuse Ben. Horribly. I think this is a good time to mention that Oakland plays mostly zone. Or, at least they did when we played them.
Denver can't produce a pass rush. Even if they could against other teams, their defensive line consists of a bunch of guys who used to play for Cleveland and weren't good enough to hang on with the Browns. And they don't blitz much, if ever.
When the Broncos have the ball, all they can do is run it. They ran all over Indy, but Indy gives up 158 yards a game on the ground. We don't. When we face a team that can only run the ball, we usually dominate. We need to put the ball in Jake Plummer's hands and wait for him to screw up. It happened in the AFC Championship Game and it will happen on Sunday.
We'll stop the run, confound Plummer (seriously, Rod Smith is 100 years old and I dare you to name another receiver on the roster beyond Javon Walker), and pounce on those few, key turnovers.
Why We Won't Win:
18 turnovers in 7 games. In two of those games (both wins) we comitted a total of two turnovers. That means that, in five losses, we've committed SIXTEEN turnovers. We'll lose if Ben plays like he did against Oakland. Or everyone else plays like they did against Atlanta and Cincy.
Denver's fired up, too. Their defense got beat to hell and back by the Colts last week. Their nose is bloody. The question is whether they'll respond like Skutt Farkas and cry, or respond like Jean-Claude Van Damme and beat the crap out of us. In French.
Here's the worst part. WE'RE THREE POINT FAVORITES! Either Vegas has completely lost their minds, or they're trying to motivate the Broncos. I'm not sure which it is. I do, however, refuse to believe that a rational thinking person thinks we're going to win by three.
I mean, I think we're going to win by ten. So there you go.
Prediction: Steelers 20, Broncos 10
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